Is It Right To Marry Someone You Have No Romantic Feelings For?


You have met someone who is very hard working, mature, and perhaps with a lot of wealth and intelligence. The only problem is that you are not romantically attracted to this person. Even the fact that you get along well has merely left you regarding this person as a sibling friend. What role does romantic attraction play in a marriage? What would happen if you married this person? What if you are already married to such a person?

The role played by romantic attraction 
In any happy marriage, intimacy is enjoyed, and it needs to be there. But the intimacy that is found here is fueled by romantic feelings and the attraction that comes with it. In the end, a husband feels a special or unique attachment to his wife because of the attraction he has towards her and the same applies to the wife.  This intimacy is not shared among mere friends or relatives.
A husband feels a special
 or unique attachment to his wife 
because of the attraction he has towards her
It is a gift God has given to married couples so that they can enjoy their marital due and, when circumstances permit, even have children. Therefore, romantic attraction must be there in a progressive and promising relationship besides the other qualities.

What if you marry someone you are not romantically attracted to?
Imagine going on a very long journey with your car which has a very small problem like a slow puncture or a faulty startor! You reduce the chances of reaching your destination either on time or safely because the length of the journey can also reveal other problems. Similarly, the closeness in a marriage, which is meant to last a life time, can expose other weaknesses you never knew about yourselves. With the pressure of life's problems also acting on the other end, your marriage may have a short lifespan especially as it may become clear to both of you that you married someone you have no feelings for.

The closeness in a marriage,
 which is meant to last a life time, 
can expose other weaknesses you never knew...


 However, the worst part comes in when you start failing to give that person their marital due (sex) eventually forcing them to go outside marriage to seek get what you are denying them. Therefore, if you don't have feelings for someone, dont marry them.

But I am already married to this person!
Unfortunately, lack of romantic feelings for a mate does not constitute valid grounds for ending a marriage. The only grounds for a divorce are either fornication or adultery. Therefore, if you are already married to someone you are not attracted to, you have two options:
  1. Transform the person into the character you want them to be. Avoid being judgmental and don't give up on all the efforts you make to change them to what you yearn for.
  2. Accept them as they are. Be understanding and start looking carefully at the  qualities that attracted you to this person. You are likely to get the spark where it has been hiding.
In any decision you want to take at this point, effective communication is a must. Let your partner know how you appreciate every effort they put forth to make the marriage work, and lovingly help them overcome the barriers you are seeeing. You equally have to do the same.

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